Sticks and Stones...

I'm not sure I really agree with that old saying "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me". I think that was just another come back to teach kids to save face and not let others know that their words really DID hurt them.

And while we're at it... doesn't it seem like sometimes you use the nastiest words with the ones you love.. I even think that's another saying "we hurt the ones we love the most, because we 'know' they will forgive us". But I don't think we should jump the gun and necessarily assume that.. one can only handle so much for so long!

I'm sure that we have all, most likely, been in both positions before: the victim and the "meanie". I know I definitely have! And it can happen with anyone: spouse/significant other, brother, sister, mom/dad, close friend, etc.

When you're the 'meanie' the worst part about the whole thing is that sometimes you don't realize it until it's too late (you've said something and afterward you wish you could have taken it back) or if you hear someone talk to someone else impatiently or in a not so nice tone it makes your heart break and then you think.. "is that what I sound like?" And then you have to go make a mends, patch a whole, show the person how you truly do feel about them, all while feeling pretty bad and mad at yourself about how you've treated them!

And when you are on the other side of the situation you can't help but feel bad, make justifications for how the other person is treating you, and go on to see 'hmm did I bring this on; what did I do to make them talk or act this way toward me?' Sometimes it doesn't even have to be that obvious.. sometimes it's the things that aren't said or the tone that isn't used... everything could be "fine", but when you hear someone else talking you think to yourself, 'I wish they would talk to me like that, or were a little more patient or light hearted with me as they were to that other person" all the while knowing you are one of their "top fives".

I guess the main point I am trying to get across is during the holiday season and the coming of the new year (as we rack our brains for a new, new year's resolution) let's really put some extra effort into the ones we love the most. Whether it's telling them straight on, being more affectionate, giving them positive affirmations, talking more, talking nicer, or just an extra 'thanks or please". Cause even though YOU know how much you love someone or know how much YOU are loved, sometimes a little positive reinforcement never hurt anyone!